I’m going to be honest here because I want to make sure you understand where I am coming from as you go further with me on this journey. This experience could have been so different if I had of known I had options but ultimately I gave up.
In the end I gave in to having the c-section because I wanted my OB out of my life and the way I saw it once our baby was born I would have one more appointment with her and then I was done!!!
It was terrifying to go into the hospital for a surgery to meet our baby and I’m so grateful that my mom was at home waiting to come as soon as I was settled into a room. What was even better than that was having Jonathan (my husband) there by my side every second that he could be.
Little known fact about me, I HATE needles, and am terribly afraid of something going wrong if I have to have any type of procedure done, so this event was not a pleasant one for me on any level.
So we showed up at our appointed time, I went through a weird wiping down sterilizing process and was then waiting for the dreaded needles part, for some reason they don’t let your husband come in until all that is complete, so again I’m a nervous wreck without my support system.
When they finally took us back into the OR it got really uncomfortable, and now that I think about it I don’t even think that my doctor came to say anything to me before the operation. Doesn’t really surprise me………..I was just a number on her chart that day.
I was strapped down to the table, almost felt like being on a cross the way they have your arms straight out to your sides, but anyways…...The anesthesiologist (seriously I can’t believe I spelled that right :P) came and did the saddle block (I think that is what it’s called).
Want to know what the weirdest part of the c-section was???
I could feel them touching me and pushing my belly around. I could feel the cold iodine that they rolled all over my belly and I swear I was ready to scream because I thought I would be able to feel them cutting me too, but I didn’t feel any of that!!! I was crying the whole time and I could tell that my husband felt absolutely helpless to comfort me or make things better for me in any way.
On 1/23/2014 at 10:14 am we welcomed our baby girl into this world. Hearing her cry for that first time was like music to my ears!! I was a mommy, after waiting for soooo long!!!!
When they handed her to the nurses, who rushed her over to the heated baby bassinet thing (yeah I have no idea what it’s called), I had to twist my head all the way up and to the left to just get a glimpse of her! I had made Jonathan promise that he would go with Khaleesi once she was born, so as I watched him talking to her in those first moments I was in awe and sad that I couldn’t be right there next to him like I wanted to be.
As I watched I thought WHY are her legs flopping around up there by her body? (I will share more about this in a future blog as I learned some things just 5 weeks after she was born that truly amazed me about the birth process!)
The nurses seemed to be so rough with her as they rubbed all the fluids and vernix off of her and cleared her airways. She was screaming and wasn’t at all happy about any of this new world. And who could blame her, it was bright, she was being manhandled, and was not cuddled next to the only smell she already knew (ME)?!?
It seemed like FOREVER before they brought her over to me and laid her on my chest for that first time. Someone released one of my arms so that I could FINALLY hold her!! I was so in love with her already.