How often do we jump into things before we know much about it? New jobs, married life, parenting, the list can go on to include your finances and even your legacy and how you build it. We are constantly in a state of learning it seems.
As women in this 21st century we tend to think we know more about becoming a mom than we actually do, I know I did anyways. As much advice as I gave to my close friends that had kids you would have thought that I was an expert and boy I was so far from an expert, still am.
As much as I fought to conceive my first child (second pregnancy), getting help and going through uncomfortable, sometimes even painful procedures, to figure out why I wasn’t getting pregnant, it was all too easy to just follow the status quo and check all the boxes.
It was a lesson hard learned, as most of the good ones are. Along that journey I learned first hand how important it is to ask questions and research the information you are provided so that YOU can make the decision that is RIGHT for YOU and YOUR family. Since then I have learned so much because I decided to go against the flow and find my own way through the rough waters of advocating and doing things your own way in pregnancy and childbirth.
Whether you believe in the medical system or not is besides the point, your health and well-being in any circumstance is ALWAYS your responsibility and if you choose not to learn as you walk through that process you are unprepared to make educated decisions. When things go sideways in your care after you have followed the directive given to you without question who is responsible?
That first term pregnancy, when I followed the status quo and checked all the boxes, I chose to just do what I was told, didn’t do any research along the way or even trust my gut in some instances. I ended up FEELING bullied, pressured, and just plain degraded. My birth experience wasn’t what I wanted it to be at all and I was mad at the doctor.
Then my eyes were opened and I realized that I CHOSE to follow the status quo, CHOSE not to ask questions and trust my gut, and I CHOSE to settle on a scheduled cesarean section that I DIDN’T want, ultimately handing over my power.
Again MY choices.
So ultimately we have to accept that responsibility, forgive those involved, including ourselves, and CHOOSE to move on making a better decision next time. Learning is our superpower and knowledge cannot be taken away from us! Keep learning and ALWAYS make decisions that are right for you and your family.
Oh, by the way, if this has spoken to you and you want more encouraging, uplifting, and supportive information, I have created a community I think you might like! You will find more great tips, empowering birth stories, and the support of a community that will come alongside you through your journey! Click here to join now.